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March 16th, 2011
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.”
– Robert Frost
Responsibility is a word that can cause some people to get excited, while causing others to cringe. In an age where it seems like we have no shortage of things for which we must be responsible, it’s very natural, and quite understandable, to desire a little less responsibility. Who wouldn’t like to have one less thing on their plate, or one less person or situation demanding their attention? Life can quickly find us in overwhelm mode, and it’s time to say, ENOUGH ALREADY!
… But not necessarily in the way that you think.
What we’ve lost sight of, perhaps, or where our perspective may have become skewed, is that we always have a choice. We’re only victims of our circumstances if we grant that power and authority to our circumstances. Situations – i.e., LIFE – will always unfold in an unpredictable manner, and change will always be a constant. So, why, exactly, are we so surprised by the unpredictability of life? Couldn’t you have predicted that?
In the end, what life can never take from you is your response-ability – your ability to respond.
Situations occur… So what?!
The boss calls and needs you to rearrange all of your priorities right now… So what?!
Your spouse calls and says, “Sorry, Hon… I can’t make it back in time to pick-up the kids. You’ll need to get them and drive them to the 34 different activities they’re involved in tonight.” So what?!
Your new girlfriend or boyfriend who just can’t do anything wrong finally does something wrong. So what?!
I’d like to list more serious situations around illness, death, finances, suffering in some way, but I don’t want to make light of the gravity of any individual’s personal situation; however, everyone has experienced such difficult times. Everyone has a burden they are shouldering (most likely unnecessarily), and everyone still has a choice to make! Everyone can still choose to respond in a way that enables them to move forward, to move on, to regain their happiness, and to follow their bliss.
It’s not necessarily easy… but it sure is freeing!
Stay tuned for more response-ability in upcoming posts. Until then, think about a typical situation that frustrates you or really upsets you. How will you choose to exercise your response-ability - now that you know that you have a choice in how you respond - the next time such a situation comes up?
Until next time, Live on Fire!
D. Luke Iorio, CPC, PCC, ELI-MP
President & CEO
Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)
Tags: achievement, attitude, coach training, intentions, leadership, life coach training, self-improvement Posted in Business Development, D. Luke Iorio - iPEC CEO, Energy Leadership, Training Programs, Upcoming Events & Workshops, leadership 3 Comments »
March 11th, 2011
It’s Friday, and Fridays are a great time to set-up for next week. Achievement is fueled by focus; so, ready.… set…. focus!
• What are your top three priorities right now?
• Why are those the priorities? (Hint: think in terms of aligning your priorities with your goals and vision.)
• What are your immediate, next three steps for each of them?
• What’s needed to take those steps?
• Which one will you do first? Next? And then?
• What will you do to minimize distractions and place new items to the side?
• What’s your time frame to complete these priorities?
And now… get’er done! C’mon! Stop letting moss grow under those feet. Go, go, go!
Go… Live on Fire!
D. Luke Iorio, CPC, PCC, ELI-MP
President & CEO
Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)
Tags: Add new tag, choice, coaching skills, expectations, intentions, opportunity, personal achievement, self-improvement Posted in Business Development, D. Luke Iorio - iPEC CEO, Upcoming Events & Workshops No Comments »
August 31st, 2010
The educational system is at a turning point.
Though it has taken a beating in the past few years – shrinking budgets, increased regulation and complexity, greater job demands, and a lower influx of new teachers (i.e. new energy) — it is actually the perfect time to redefine the meaning of educational success, and as a community band together in its pursuit.
Children are not just their grades and test scores, their parents and the support they get, their individual aptitudes or emotional development, the classrooms they’re in or the teachers they have… it’s actually all of those things, and more.
Educational success must be measured by how well we are developing 21st century students who are global thinkers with strong communication, relationship, and team-working skills; and how well we are readying our young people to be the leaders of the future, able to flourish and thrive.
Our role as a community of engaged educators is to produce innovators, entrepreneurs, and contributors to society. By teaching our young people about decision making, about values, about emotions, and about the way they think, we are watering the seeds of greatness in each child.
Success can further be defined as our ability to provide excellent leadership to each student, utilizing coaching technology that brings out the full potential of each student. By providing robust tools that positively impact the whole child, across his or her life, and throughout his or her development, the Educational Leadership Coach Training program (www.CoachTrainingforEducators.com) allows professional educators to see more angles, understand the interconnectedness of diverse elements, and focus their efforts in a way that brings about positive, substantial, and sustainable change.
In the world in which we live today, our success as educators will depend on our ability to create a culture that is focused on “what’s right,” one in which parents and community, standing alongside our teachers, principals, and superintendents, see the greatness in every child, and are committed to that child’s intellectual, physical, and emotional well-being.
What will that new culture look like? Inside the classroom we’ll adopt new approaches, more deeply embedding multiple learning modalities, customizing lesson plans to the individual student, and demonstrating leadership and improving interpersonal skills through coaching competencies like intuitive listening and acknowledgement and validation.
Outside the classroom, we will lead through social interactions, getting our students involved in more than just academics, and encouraging them to become involved in their communities and to pursue their passions.
Some of these approaches have been in the works and are in use today; other approaches are still in the making to figure out what’s going to best educate students based on today’s requirements.
In order to meet those requirements, we need to become even more aware of all the factors that are impacting our children – to recognize that when students don’t feel physically and emotionally safe, true learning doesn’t happen. When students are hungry, they must be fed. When they are afraid and lack confidence, they must be reassured. Their basic needs have to be met so that their minds are free to learn.
We need to set up an environment that is risk free, and to nurture and support students every day, no matter how they show up to class in the moment. We need to empower students to come up with their own answers and to view situations from a holistic perspective. We need to learn to trust that they can lead themselves, and that they can learn how to make effective decisions that factor in many perspectives.
So who do educational leaders and other professional educators need to become to deliver on this new vision?
We need to become great leaders and great coaches. As more and more effective educators develop their true ability to lead and use the power of coaching, more and more children will mirror those forms of positive communication that seek to bring forth the inner brilliance and worth of each person.
Written by Alan Cohen
Tags: coach training, education, educational coach training Posted in Coaching and Coach Training, Energy Leadership, Upcoming Events & Workshops 1 Comment »
July 28th, 2010
By Guest Blogger Vijay Aluwalia
What is Feedback?
Most of us have worked in the corporate arena at some point, so we are used to the idea of feedback in the workspace. We have all given feedback, we’ve all received it, we know it’s necessary, we understand the purpose – or do we? If our goal of feedback relates to encouraging a person to continue in a specific way (so that the desired result is ‘sustained’) or to encourage a change in approach (so that the desired result is ‘attained’) then how mindful are we really, when it comes to how we choose to communicate our ‘feedback’?
Dale Carnegie summarizes this lack of awareness very well. “Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain … and most fools do.” {I would replace the word fool with person but I think you get my point.}
Here’s a typical workplace scenario most of us can relate to - Someone does something a little annoying and not to your taste. You leave it for a while. The same actions keep occurring over time. Everyone deals with it in a nice manner. It’s inconvenient but nothing is said. Then one day, the consequences are significant for you personally, your temper increases, and you let them have it. Quite a strong message is delivered and you leave thinking you have solved the issue and that you are a “champion of feedback.”
Pretty run of the mill stuff right? Let’s take a step back a moment. Who was the subject? A coworker - presumably human with feelings? What was the objective? To encourage change? There are a few different definitions of encourage but nearly all of them center around the idea of mental support, motivation, hope, and spirit.
So, with this objective in mind, how likely is it that the tactics used were the right ones?
What are some of the coach approach skills you have learned that can help you create more desirable dialogue? For some examples of these and to read our 4 simple rules to follow, please come visit us at www.varune.com.
By Guest Blogger Vijay Aluwalia,
Varune, Project Leadership
Tags: feedback, relationships, workplace Posted in Business Development, Coaching and Coach Training, Energy Leadership, Training Programs, Upcoming Events & Workshops No Comments »
May 13th, 2010
Leaders frequently find themselves involved in sales and negotiations processes. Skills, beliefs, thoughts, and fears all affect one’s ability to persuade, respond to objections, and arrive at a final course of action.
Our ability to communicate effectively, authentically, and with passion is at the heart of sales.
Language has the power to create energy and is also a powerful expression of energy. While a word is just a word, our society, the dictionary, and our experiences attach meaning to words. Therefore, energy is attached to words.
Becoming mindful of language means that you can not only notice the energy of a given message, but it means that you can more readily change your language to meet an audience where they are… pick up on the keywords and phrases that they use (and how they use them and say them), and you’ll begin to get a great sense and understanding for how they see their world and the labels that they use.
As we develop rapport with our potential customers – the first very important step of the sales process – and throughout the cycle, here are some points to remember. These concepts will enhance one’s abilities as communicator and increase the probability of a great outcome:
BODY LANGUAGE
Ninety-three percent (93%) of the message is conveyed through physical attributes. The tone or sound of the voice (38%) and the body language/presentation style (55%) communicate powerfully. Words are only 7% of the impact upon an audience.
Body language also affects the energy of communication even when not communicating in person.
TONE OF VOICE
The tone of our voice impacts our message and our audience whether we are interacting in person, speaking over the phone, or recording a message, such as voice mail or a taped/recorded presentation. Tone of voice becomes even more important in those situations (e.g., phone, voice mail) where the audience/other person does not have the benefit of observing body language.
ENERGETIC PERSPECTIVE
Words and the energy behind them are important to the power of a message. They affect how an audience receives a message and is consequently motivated to action. Words also conjure up and create energy inside of the person who is speaking the words.
By becoming aware of the energy of language, a leader can become more effective in creating highly anabolic communication that inspires growth, development, creativity, and opportunity.
LISTENING
Listening with an open mind (a beginner’s mind) creates a foundation for creativity, intuition, and wisdom to flourish. Not listening decreases and drains energy for both the listener and the person being listened to. The person being listened to feels limited, slighted, and less important. The listener is distracted – this alone distorts and decreases energy.
Listening can be a challenge because:
1. We have less training and practice in listening than the other forms of communication. Listening as a mode of communication is used 40% of the time yet our formal training is very minimal, if any.
2. By comparison, writing, which is used 9% of the time, is where we’ve all had at least 12 years of formal training (grades 1 – 12).
3. We can take in information faster than it can be spoken. The average person’s rate of listening is 400-500 words per minute. The average person’s rate of speech is 110 – 160 words per minute. So when we are listening, our minds can wander with its excess capacity. As a result, we can get distracted or lose focus.
When you are clear, without catabolic beliefs and fears, and become conscious of the different ways we communicate, you will more easily attract and connect with your desired clients and motivate them to buy your products and service.
Tags: sales training, self-improvement, success Posted in Training Programs, Upcoming Events & Workshops No Comments »
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