Coaching Excellence blog


Choosing to Choose

Choice. It’s sort of a funny thing. We make thousands of choices every day – some obvious; many, not so obvious.

We choose what to wear, whether or not to go to the gym, what to eat, what to do first, and so on. These are the tangible, visible choices. But, it’s the choices we don’t see that impact us the most.

We choose how to react to any sign that our day might not go as expected. We choose how to interpret that slightly mixed message from our boss or our spouse. We choose how we’re going to start the day, to get the ball (and our energy and emotions) rolling in the direction we want.

Or do we?

Is it possible that we let our unconscious mind use our past, our circumstances, and our unspoken beliefs to filter out what we do and do not see, and let those unconscious elements choose for us?

Oops… that might just be it!

Choosing to choose means overriding this unconscious, deeply conditioned process.

Choosing to choose means waking up, becoming aware, becoming vigilant or mindful, becoming intentional, becoming purposeful, and becoming present, in the moment, to understand what we’re really seeing, feeling, perceiving, and thinking.

Choosing to choose means proactively seeking to set ourselves up to be conscious in the moment – so that we can be aware of the choices we’re making. In this moment of conscious choice comes extraordinary power and leverage to create our day, guide our energy, shape our interactions and relationships…and so much more.

At work or at home, if you aren’t feeling the way you’d like feel, or you aren’t as engaged as you’d like to be, consider what different choices you could be making. Do NOT make this about others or about circumstances. Look deeper! Look within. Hold your feet to the fire.

Choosing to choose is about you, about your power, about your ability to respond, about your ability to create, to motivate, to lead.

If you need a starting point, try this:

- Choose what will be the first thoughts that run through your head, in the morning, as you prepare to start your day, as best you can. Write those thoughts (perhaps what you’re grateful for) on a notepad and keep that right next to your bed, so you can grab it and look at those thoughts right as you wake up.

- Choose what you want running through your mind at night. (Same as above, look at your notes as you lay down at night.)

- Choose a new reaction – consider what person or situation has been really pressing your buttons, and consider what might be a different approach you could take the next time it comes up, which might lead you to a better result. Be curious; try out a few new approaches, until you find what works for you.

- Choose to be patient and reflect when you’d normally jump in. Or, if you’re too patient, choose to jump in and reflect afterwards, for a change.

Just start CHOOSING! Begin today and watch the power of choice spiral through your day, week, and life!

Live on Fire!

D. Luke Iorio, CPC, PCC, ELI-MP
President & CEO
Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching (iPEC)

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