By Guest Blogger CJ Scarlet
Within two weeks after the idea for my new coaching venture tumbled out of my mouth, I read Bruce Schneider’s Energy Leadership and I shifted. This book immediately changed my thinking about what coaching could accomplish when done from the right energy levels and for the right reasons.
A few months later I attended Module IV, Energy Leadership and I was transformed. Everything I knew as a coach and a human being was challenged and a totally new perspective of the world emerged. I have been an Energy Leadership evangelist ever since.
I would like to share with you five simple yet profound ways Energy Leadership and iPEC's Breakthrough Laser Coaching have changed the way I do business—both as a coach and as an entrepreneur:
1. Garbage in, garbage out. If I am not in a healthy state of mind, especially when coaching, I will not achieve the results I seek. Without exception, I am most effective in my personal and professional interactions when I am in anabolic energy. My partners and I created a short centering exercise that we and our coaches use before entering a session, based on the acronym You COACH. It goes like this:
Center. Physically and emotionally release old energy. Enter the Now. Call on your Higher Coach.
Offer gratitude for the opportunity to serve. Open a safe space for wisdom, understanding and learning.
Allow. Release responsibility for the outcome. Trust yourself. Trust the process. Trust your client.
Create the environment for possibilities and choices to emerge.
Honor the innate wisdom and potential of your client and yourself.
2. Look to the thought. To get to the right action, first get the right thought behind it. This makes sense, as you cannot achieve the right action if your thinking is off-base. Our coaches explain to each client that “Thoughts lead to feelings, which lead to actions” in order to help them appreciate that a new thought is required if change is going to occur. We then help the client explore new ways of thinking that enlarge their perspective, help them recognize that they alone possess the power to change their situation, and take action. Works every time!
3. Validation is extremely important. People long to feel validated and heard—in fact, I believe it is one of our most important needs, second only to being loved. As coaches, if all we do is listen and validate, we will have met the most basic needs of our clients. I love the look of relief and appreciation on my clients’ faces when they get validated. It validates me and helps me know I’m making a difference in their lives.
4. You’re only human. As a leader, I have been confronted and my leadership skills tested on a few occasions, and it’s not always easy to maintain my composure. Sometimes I rise to the occasion and sometimes I respond from a place of defensiveness or fear. Just recently I made an error in judgment that frustrated one of my partners. I felt absolutely sick about it, and it was only through the long discussion that followed that I was able to realize that I am terrified of making mistakes. I have this unrealistic expectation that I will do it perfectly every time, all the time. My wise partners advised me to offer myself permission to not be perfect, and a weight dropped from my shoulders. Give yourself permission to make the occasional mistake; we’re only human, after all.
5. BLC works…for everyone. I have yet to apply BLC in a personal or professional setting when it didn’t work. Each of us has at least one friend or relative who lives in Level 1 energy, constantly complaining and seeing everything in a negative light. A close relative of mine is like this, and for decades I tried to motivate her to think and act more positively, to no avail. But when I applied the BLC method to her situation, it worked beautifully! First and foremost, I validated her, which I don’t think I’ve ever done before because I was afraid it would send the message that I agreed with her negativity. When I used validating language, her tone shifted and she began to talk more positively. Because she felt heard, she didn’t feel like she had to complain louder to get my attention. As a result, she was open to being coached to achieve a shift in her perspective. She hasn’t called me to complain since! The premise of Breakthrough Laser Coaching is so simple, yet so profound, and people find themselves sharing so deeply that I am humbled over and over again.
I urge everyone to use the principles they learned in their training to not only better meet the needs of your clients, friends and loved ones, but for yourself as well. Breakthrough Laser Coaching and Energy Leadership change lives. Let it change yours.
About CJ Scarlet:
CJ Scarlet is Chief Rover of Roving Coach International, an official partner of iPEC that is working to create World Peace in the Workplace. Roving Coach offers Breakthrough Laser Coaching to middle manager and other employees who don't typically get access to coaching like the "big dogs" do. For more information, please visit www.rovingcoach.com.